There. Now that the big announcement is out of the way ;) I can post this blog I’ve been wanting to write for the past month! :)
When we arrived back in Beirut, I was about 8 weeks pregnant. I hadn’t seen a doctor yet, so we hadn’t told anyone yet except our immediate family in the States. I’m one of those really fortunate girls that doesn’t get morning sickness when I’m pregnant (so far!). I feel really nauseous, especially in the evenings, but that problem is solved if I eat. Continually.
So, the continuous eating combined with three months of amazing Mexican food while in the States meant that I came back to Lebanon carrying an extra 7 or so pounds. I was feeling a bit self conscious about it – if you’ve ever been pregnant, you understand… I was in that “looking fat but not yet obviously pregnant stage.”
And everyone felt the need to comment.
Doorman at building I frequent often: “Wow! You got fat in America.”
Guards that we pass by every day, to my husband: “You still look the same – thin.” And to me: “You, not really.”
I know this is totally a Lebanese thing. When I lost the baby weight after Isla, everyone commented on that as well. But what I can’t figure out is which one is a good comment. In the States, people often congratulate you on weight lost, especially if it is something they know you have worked really hard to do. But here, the comments about my shrinking frame were mostly accompanied by a “tsk, tsk.”
So, does that mean that it’s a good thing that I “got fat” in America? I’m not so sure. In a country where 70-80% of the women have had plastic surgery (!!!), it seems contraindicated that gaining weight would be a good thing. And I’ve definitely heard my fair share of negative comments about other people who are overweight. But would they really tell me such a negative thing about myself to my face? I’m leaning towards yes, but I’m not quite sure.
I do know that in many cultures, being heavy is actually considered a very good thing – it means you are wealthy, or eat well, or are blessed by God, or many other things. I’m just still trying to figure out what it means here. For now, let the comments continue…. at least I have a good excuse (for the next 6 months at least)!